The diary of Syrus Truesdale
by QueenWolf12
Summary: This Syrus's diary. But who's this other person writing in it? Syrus,has a very big promblem! And it's name is MARK! Much better than it sounds,please Read and Review! Rated:T for, Mental illness,sucidal thoughts,and gore.
1. It stars again

Hi,me again.

Gee......Its sure has been a while,huh.

Well,I havn't been doing much,but I have had stuff happen.I mean it started again.

I thought I was threw with it.

Guess,I was wrong.

It was bad bad.I mean since I thought it was over,I wasn't even ecpeting it,so I really paniced!

I'll start from the begaining.

I woke up,while I was woken up by J and Sarge.,for our moring jog.I tried to get out of bed,but it was real I wanted to,but my mind was telling my body not I just rolled around for a second an didn't open my eyes.

But when,I actully TRIED to get up,my stomach was in knotes!I mean it was cramped really bad.

Sarge told me to stay in bed and that he'd come back and see if I felt well enought to get to class.J got me some ginger-ale for my stomach.

Once,they lefted I tried to sleep,but my head hurt so bad.I was pulling at my just hurt so bad.

Then I remeber hearing the voices again.

They keeped talking to me,telling me that it was alright,then telling me that I was a worthless pieace of shit and I should kill myself and do the world a favor.

It was just two voices at first,but then their where more,and more,and just keeped getting louder and louder!

Till,finally I just screamed and told them to stop!  
I fell,out of bed and I blacked out.

The next thing I knew Jaden was shaking me,and I had vomit all over my Pj's.(Must have throwen up)

But whats real weird is that I didn't seem to mind the throw up,I had all over myself.

I remember telling Jaden that I was going to class! He made me get into bed.  
I can hardly remember what happened after that. I hope Jaden and Hasselberry don"t suspected anything.

I hope this dosn't happen again.I thought I had it under controll.

Well,I can keep it at theres no point in going to a doctor for this.

I gotta go,bye.

-Syrus J. Truesdale

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	2. Really bording chpter read chapter 3

**I own nothing! Also,thank you TissesXO for helping me with this!**

**You rock girl!**

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**OCT. 6**

I went back to schoo today. I felt much better. Best part,no VOICES!

I have no idea what happened yesterday. I knew why it happened.

I sometimes just get a headach and go to sleep and when I wake up,something bad had hapened.

Like,this one time when I was five(the very first time it happened)I blacked out. When I woke up,money was missing from my mom's purse. She hunted all over the house for it,and found it in **MY ROOM**!

She asked me,why I would steal from her. I told her I didn't do it! She told me not to lie,and put me in a time-out.

Well,I gotta go. Im in math class right now,and I got to take a test.(I hope I pass)

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Still Oct. 6

Im sitting in my room. Jaden,Hassilberry,and the gang are at dinner. I was going to study for my next test,but my head started to hurt so I decided to write.

My hed really,hurts. My stomachs' a little queasy, too. I think Im going to hit the sack.

-Sy

P.S I made a C- on my math test!

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**O.k,you got threw that chapter,huh. Well,read the next,it's gonna be much better!**

**This was just the warm up. Now the next chapter is very bloody..so....ENJOY!**


	3. Meet MARK!

**Like I said last time! I own nothing! Also,thanks again to TissesXO! You got to love her. Also,thanks to all the people who read and review! Also,to find out who Mark is,read the bottom!  
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_OCt. 7_

_I finaly got in controll again! I havn't had so much fun in my life!_

_I'll start from the begaining._

_Once,Syrus fell asleep I took over. I havn't done that in a year or so it felt good to be in my body. Oops,I mean mine and Syrus's body._

_Well,anyway at first I had no clue where "we" where. Then I spotted mine and Sy's yellow backpack and dug around in it. I found a texbook that said"Duel Academy"on it!_

_"Great,he's dragged us to some stupid dueling school."I groaned. But after a while,I decided to go outside for some fresh air.....to raise a little hell!_

_It ws really late at night. Perfice. Thats the only word that came to my mind!_

_I walked around for a little while,and evitually,I found a kitchen._

_This when the fun starts!_

_When I was in the kitchen, I found some butcher knifves. I was real borad so I played stab scoch.(You know when you take a knife and move it really fast between your fingers.) Then in the middle of my game, this big fat cat comes up to me and rubs agnst my leg!_

_I was gonna let it be,so I shooed it away. But it wouldn't go on!_

_I was about to kick that tubby cat in it's ribs,when a much better idea poped into my head._

_I lefted the butcher knife up,and stabed the cat in the back!_

_The best part was that it didn't kill the cat,it just pareilzed it. That little S.O.B cried out in pain._

_I liked it._

_I had power for the first time in years! Then,I used the knife to cut that beast's tail into little peices!_

_It hissed and scrached at me. But I just laughed. It was funny. That cat couldn't even move its legs,and it was loseing blood,so it couldn't win._

_I was having so much fun,I could have started giggling like a school girl!_

_I then held the cats head,took the knife and sit its thoart! _

_Once,it died I chopped its head off. I put that monster's head in a stew pot!_

_But anyway,after that I used its blood to write this on the wall:_

_" I murder so I can come back."_

_After,I had my fun I went back to the room,I guess I me and Sy sleep in now._

_I had fun,tonight. I think I'll come out ore,cause the idoits here are gonna be real fun to mess with._

_Yours Truely,_

_MARK!_

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**Yes,I know what a dark chapter. I told you it gets better. Oh, Mark is Sy's other half. Mark comes out when Sy goes to sleep or gets to stressed out or something.**

**So,to sum it all up Sy has two people in his head! Him and Mark! They,shair Sy's body(no duh)**

**Well,it's 11:43,so i'll update over the week end!**


	4. Stirring up trouble!

**Im back people! Im getting ready of for HALLOWEEN!!!! Yes,Im gonna keep working on this story.**

**Thanks to all the people who are reading this! If you read please,review. I really want to know what my readers think.**

**I don't own anything. Yes,Mark is twisted.....**

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Oct. 15

Oh,MY GOSH! SOMEONE MURDERED PHARAOH! I was awful! Poor cat.

He was butchered! BUTCHERED I TELL YOU!

This is how we found out.......

Me,Jay,And Hassliberry woke up to someone screaming! It was Dorathy.**( I can't fucken spell her name right!)** The whole slifer dorm herad her and ran down to the kitchen to see what was the matter.

She was on the floor in shock cring! She was pale as a ghost,but who could blame her. Jaden asked her what hapened. But when I looked up,I saw what happened. I screamed bloodly murder!

The whole kitchen was covered in blood! Pharaoh's skinned body was on the floor headless! The back of him,was on the wall! Someone,made a fur rug out of him!

Then written on the wall was a message,saying;

"I murdered so I can come back"

The knifves where scattered about the room,stained in blood. We found Pharaoh's head in a stew pot. I thought I was gonna be sick!

I never could handle blood. It made my stomach go to my throat.

All I know is that who ever killed pharaoh is a sick,twisted fuck! I mean who the hell dose this!

I gotta go. Me and the guys are helping clean up and calm down Dorathy.

Guess,which one Im doing.

-Syrus

P.S Dorathy really loved that cat. She was cring on my shoulder just now(Still is)and my jacket got soaked!

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Oct. 16

It's past midnight. So,It's the 16th. I can't sleep. Im to shucken up,buy what happened. So I decided to write a little.

Im not feeling the greatest. Maybe,it was what happened today or maybe Im coming down with something. My head keeps hurting and my stomach keeps getting qeasey.

I must be getting the flu or a stomach bug!

But anyway,I'd go to sleep but It's impossible to even doze off with Hassilberry and Jaden sorning like chain saws!

I need to go to bed first from now on. Then maybe I'd be able to sleep.

Im gonna try to get some shut eye.

Good night-Syrus

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_Oct. 16_

_Oh,MY GOSH!_

_HOW THE HELL DOSE SYRUS SLEEP IN THIS ROOM!_

_I woke up in the same room again,and this time these two guys where soring! My lord,it's like pigs squeling,and being killed at the same time!_

_Anyway,I'll get back what I did. _

_Yup,got in controll once again! Go,me!_

_Well,from what Syrus has wrote,they found out about the cat. Man,people seem to care when you kill some fat old whore's cat._

_Anyway,I went for my midnight stroll. (Thats the only time I get out,so I try to enjoy myself.)_

_I went for a walk and came across this big dorm! Dorm,more like a manison! It was white with a blue roof,and had flowers growing all around it!_

_I saw one of those things tall fence things that are great for climing and roses grow all over them. What are they called? Oh,never mind._

_I climed up it and when I got to the window,I looked inside._

_I saw like 20 girls! In there! I mean theu where pretty! _

_I keeped looking,cause they where changing and having pellow fights,and then one of them saw me._

_They screamed and I fell! I laided hard on mine and Sy's rear. Then took off._

_Once,I got back to the dorm I found myself in. I went inside. _

_Those two guys where snoring louder this time! So,I grabed mine and Sy's bookbage and went outside._

_I went to the kitchen. I remebered where it was. _

_I sat down and started to draw. Me and Syrus have some tantlents. Like,we can draw pretty good. Or at least draw girls good. _

_I remembered the girls and drew them pellow fighting. Only,this time I drew them nud._

_I was drooling...I bet Sy would be drooling as well. But then again,out of the two of us,Im the one who gets the horinyes._

_But anyway,I was so proud of my self so I put them up on the school net._

_I gotta go,_

_Yours Truely,_

_MARK!_

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Oct. 17

Im in D-HALL!

Guess,what for! Some who these nud pictures of some girls got on the school net,and They had myy name on them!

Well,I got in trouble for it!

I was sitting in class when I got called to the offic and then told about this! I told them I didn't do it! I told them I didn't know how my name wond up on that!

But of corse they don't belive me,and I get D-HALL!

And when I got back to the dorm Alexis pimp slapped me! She said I was being a prevert and that real women don't look like that! That I need to stop having sick fantisyes and maybe I could get a girl!-Maybe!

I don't even know how my name wond up on those!

All I knon is that I got D-Hall for a week and the girls are hating me!

Life sucks!

-Syrus

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**Yeah! Thts it! This chapter is done! Yup,it was awful and preverted,but I just went with what came to be!**


	5. False calls

**Yippee! Another update because the readers want one! **

**I own nothing.**

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Oct. 20

The girls aren't mad at me anymore. Or at least some of them aren't. Im still getting the stink eye.

But at least their not throwing eggs at me or something!

Well,anyway remember how I thought I was coming down with something,well I went tot he nurse and she said it was stress and that I need to relaxe. She told me to go home,eat a nice big dinner, take a hot shower,and sleep. To not study,just to get some sleep. I told her I would. I must have looked pretty bad cause she wrote me a pass to get out of all my classes.

I had a bunch of freetime so I went to the libary. I know I don't seem like the book type,and im not really,but only because I can never find anything all that good. So I used this time to look. I found a whole book of Edager Allen Poe's peoms and short stories! I also found a world's record book. I checked those two out and went to Jaden's not so sceret spot.

It really is a nice place to read and be alone. Right now thats what I felt like doing.

-Syrus

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_Oct. 20_

_Wow! Im out in control and It's not night time! Thats a first. _

_Well,the spot I woke up at sucks. I mean whats Sy doing under a tree with books?_

_Well,anyway I wondered around for some time and found myself at a big building. I mean since this is a boarding school I figured that this was teh school building._

_Welll,any way I went up to the top floor. Then I came across the principles office! This is when the fun starts._

_The pricnabe wasn't in there. And his computer was on his desk turned on! Yeah,you can see where this was heading._

_I locked the door and sat down. The page on the computer listed all the students. I scrolled down and found Syrus. _

_Well,I clicked on it to see if anything had changed since I last come out,which was like 8 years ago. _

_Well,things had changed. Syrus and the family have moved to a new town. Din mo something._

_Well,I decided t play a little trick on his folks. I got his number and dilgled it........_

_Once they answered this is how it went down...._

_Me : Hello,is this the Truesdale household._

_Syrus's mom : Yes,may I ask who's calling._

_Me : This is Channcler Sheapered from Duel Academy. Im afraid I must inform you of an accident regarding your son Syrus._

_Syrus's mom : W-what? Is he o.k?  
Me : No..ma'ma I hate to say but he commented suicide last night._

_Syrus's mom : W-what? No,you must have the wrong number! _

_Me : No,miss Im very sorry for your lose but Im telling he truth._

_Syrus's mom : Crys_

_Me : I have to go and once again sorry for your loss he will be missed._

_HAHAHAHAH! What an idoit his mother is. I mean me and Syrus probably sound a like! Couldn't she tell I sound like her kid!  
Well,I gotta get out of here. Im kinda sitting in the princleabl's office right now._

_Yours Truely,_

_MARK_

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Oct. 21

Oh my gosh! Your not going to believe what happened. I was sitting in class and got called up to the Channcler Sheapered's office again.

I go and guess who was there my Mom and Dad!

When they saw me they ran up to me and hugged me crying like crazy! I asked what was wrong and they said they thought I was died!  
I couldn't believe it. Why would they think that?

Channcler told me they thought I'd killed my self!  
I again could not believe this! My mom wouldn't let me go! And my Dad was just listening.

I had to tell my mom over and over that I was fine and stuff. She kissed me some much that I had her lip stick all over my face!

Well,I gotta go wish my parents a goodbye.

-Syrus

p.s My mom and dad worry to much.

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_Oct. 21_

_It's late I know. Truthfully Im teird and not going to do anything. I just got in control for right now._

_Turns out Syrus's parents came here! They really believed me!_

_Well,they made fools of themselves I'll tell you that much. But they acted so weird. I mean they seemed to really care that they had lost their son._

_That makes me wonder...what would they do if they knew I've had to stop Syrus from killing himself before._

_Yours Truly,_

_MARK_

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**Just thought I'd update the story. This is my most read story......I guess it's pretty good huh.**

**Well,just so you people know I take anonymous reviews so if your not a member and reading please leave a review.**


	6. fun on October 31

**Yeah......I dind't get any reviews on the last chapter......that kinda sucked. Well,here you guys go. Chapter 6!**

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Oct. 31

It's Halloween and Im watching movies with the guys. And eating myself sick on candy.

Im not lieing I am eating my self sick here. I've had way to much candy. My stomach is killing me and keeps making nosies!

Im not lieing! Im on the caoch and Alexis is on the floor next to me and she keeps hearing my stoamch and thinking Im going to throw up!

I keep telling her Im not going to and that my stoamch only hurts a little. But she still wants me to drink some ginger-al or something.

I don't blame her,I wouldn't want to take a chance either.

-Syrus

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_Oct. 31_

_I got in controll! But once I opened my eyes,I wake up to all t hese people watching T.V! I mean come on its' Halloween! They should be out pranking and rolling people's houses,not this!  
I was about to get up when this one guy turns to me and goes,"Happy to see your up Sy." I just looked at him. Then he told me I almost missed the best part of the movie! _

_The movie was Killer Clown. At the part where the girl was getting raped and about to get her heart torn out of her chest,this bug musle guy turns to me and says,"You may want cover your eyes so you want get to scared and cry!"  
I got so pissed off! I put my fist up to him and told him if you say that one more time I'll rip your guts out and jump rope with them!  
Everyone in the room looked at me. I just went back to the watching T.V! _

_But when the girl in the movie screaming and beggin because the clown was about to rip her heart out,I couldn't help it. I laughed! It was just so danm funny! Tha stupide bitch really thought scream would save her!  
THis caused everyone to look at me. I told them that it was funny. Then the one guy who had firsted talked to me when I woke put his hand on my forhead and asked if I felt o.k . I swated his hand away and told him to piss off. Everyone in the room wa just looking at me._

_I just got up and lefted. I figured they where Sy's friends so I didn't want to hurt them. Hey,come on Syrus hardly ever gets friends so why take the ones he's got._

_But anyway I wondered around for a while and evntaully found a tool shed and got some spray paint out of it. Perfect!_

_I walked around and found the school gate and well you can guess what happened next right._

_Yeah I wrote CRowler is a kid touching ball sucker on the front wall! YEAH! I saw a picture of the g uy and was like,CHILD MILSTER!  
HAHAHAHA! Can't wait for his fagit ass to see that!_  
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Nov. 1

Oh my gosh! Someone wrote that Crowler was kid touching ball sucker on the front of the school! HAHAHAH! It was epic!  
Crowler nearly had a strock! Im sorry but that was just to funny!  
Jaden nearly wet himself! Hassiblerry was freaking out and asking if it was true! I was just laughing so hard my chest hurt!

I have to go,Crolwer is qustioning ever student to find out who did it!

-Syrus!

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**Oh lord what will MARK do next?**


	7. Relizing and making plans

**I can't belive how many people like this story! WOW! Also,I tryed to make this chapter a little long. Hope no one minds!**

**I don't own yu-gi-oh Gx! If I did you know this story would be true!**

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Nov.4

The month has started and things havn't been going so good for me. Well,I mean some strang stuff has happened.

Like a day or so ago Hassiblerry and Chazz lost their decks! We all helped look for them and couldn't find them anywhere! But when I went in my bookbage to get my books I found them! I told Jaden and guess what. He thought I stole them! I told him I would never and that I don't know how they got there.

I don't think he belived me because he just took them from me and siad he'll put them back and we could forget about it. Grrrrr..Jaden!

But last night something weirder happend to me! I woke up outside! It was the middle of the night and I woke up outside covered in fur and dirt! I freaked out and washed it all off!  
I gotta figure this out.

-Syrus

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_Nov. 4 _

_It's just bearly after 11p.m! I just found out that that Jaden guy thinks Syrus stole those decks! I am so pissed! I mean Syrus dosn't have the guts to do that!_

_Im gonna have to do something! I have to do something they know Syrus would never do!_

_I got it!_

_I'll trash that fagit Crowler's room!_

_Yours Truely,_

_MARK!_

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**Yeah I know what I short chapter. I was going to have it be longer but then I decided to make it a warm up chapter instead! The next chapter will be MUCH MUCH MUCH better!**


	8. Room trashing

**Yeah the last Chapter was a warm up chapter. This chapter is the good one. Just htough I'd let you'll know.**

**I don't own anything because people know better than to let me have the show!  
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_Nov. 5_

_It's really past midnight on the 4th so that makes it the 5th._

_Guess where I am right now! Did you guess? You give up,well I'll tell you then. Crowler's room! HAHAHAH! I wrecked the place too!  
I'll give you the details......._

_Alright,I lefted right after I wrote the last entry. I found Crowler and fallowed him around till he got to his room. I was about to break in,but then I saw a crama and used my sling-shot to break it! Im so danm smart! Heheheh_

_I then went to his window and when I saw him go into the bathroom I openeed the window and broke in! I then grabed a chair and put it up agenst the door so he couldn't get out. I heard the shower turn on and he started singing. Yeah,Im suprised I didn't go deaf. But at least I knew he wouldn't be able to hear me! HAHAHAH!_

_But anyway,then I got right to work! I opened the fagit's closet and took out all his clothes. Aww,such ugly clothes he has. They where all the same too....has this guy ever heard of variety?!_

_Well,then I tore them apart! HAHAHAHAHAAHAH! _

_I then took his make up(Yeah the guy wears make up........wtf!)and scribbled all over his clothes and the wall! _

_I decided that since I was already being a bad boy and writing on the wall,I should just go ahead a put some funny saying like I did one Halloween._

_So used his purple lipstick,and wrote on the wall,_

_**Crowler sucks moneky balls and is a hot for all the young smexy boys at the school!**_

_HAHAHAHA! That'll stick it to him good! _

_I then mashed all the rest of the make up and rubbed it all over the walls! Heheheh_

_Then I took the covers off the bed and tore them up like I did the clothes. I did the same with the curtens._

_Once,that was over it was time to move on to some real danmge! I broke off the leg of a stool and my pocket knife to sharpen it. _

_Then I used the sharp end of the leg and used it to rip the matstres apart! _

_Then I heard the shower stop and the fagit started screaming for me to let him out._

_I told him if I let him out I'l rip his heart out of his chest and eat it! HAHAHAHAHAHA!_

_Once,I was sure I put a good scare into him I picked up the stool and bashed it into the walls! HAHAHAHAH! _

_After,that I was done. I was out of breath,but done. So I decided to take a breather and write it all down in here. That child mislter is still trying to get out of the bathroom!  
Does he know that I can-_

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Nov. 5

Im in Channcler Sheapered's office right now. You are not going to belive me!

A few hours ago I woke up in Dr. Crowler's bedroom!!!! YICKS!

Yeah,I know. But when I woke up the room was a mess and I had this journal! But Crowler bursted sown the door,and scared the living crap out of me!

He was in nothing but a towel on! He grabed me and marched me down to Channcler's room!

I was freaking out and he was yelling at me. When we got to Channcler's door,Crowler was banging on the door and when Channcler came in the doorway,he pushed me inot him!  
What Crowler said shocked me! He said I locked him in his bathroom and trashed his bedroom! He even said I told him I was going to rip hios heart out and eat it!

I was freaking out and telling Channcler,who was in shock,that I didn;t do it. Crowler was yelling and saying I had to because I was in the room and he heard me telling him the rip your heart out and eat it thing!

They even have a video of me doing it! Yeah,Crowler had a video camra rolling in his room when I did that!

So,yeah now Im sitting in Channcler's office waiting on my punishment.

Im also trying to figure out how I could do that and not rememeber cause thats me on the tape.

Maybe if I tell Channcler that he'll want make my punishment so bad. Oh,who am I kidding! I should just get ready to pack my bages and go!

-Syrus

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**Yup! There you have it,chapter 8! I told you it would be better and it was! Please R & R**


	9. Spending the night in the hospital wing

**Here you guys go! Chapter 9! The story is really moving along isn't it. I have to say Im gonna be sad when the story ends,but I should just not think about it because the story is far from over!**

**I don't own anything!**

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Nov. 6

Guess,what. I didn't get punished for what happened! I know,I know! Why?

Well,I was about to get it when I told Channcler I didn't rememeber doing it! I told him that that is me on the tap,but I don't rememeber doing it.

He then asked if the nurse could come and see me. I guess,he thought something was wrong or something.

But when she got there Channcler asked if maybe I could have been sleep of corse was shocked and still tryed to make them punish me. Channcler told him to let the nurse see the tap first. She saw the tap and asked if I could spend tomorrow in the informay.

They told me to go back to bed and that was the end of it.

And thats how ened up spending the night in the informay tonight. Yeah........

-Syrus

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Nov.6

Man,Im tierd and borad as hell. I mean it. There is like nothing to do. You think that in these informy rooms they'd have T.V's or somethine but no.

I brought a book and all,and it was like 274 pages and I was on page 5,cause um well look who I live with. Yeah,I finsihed it. In like three hours because I had nothing to do! It's only nine 9:00 p.m too! AAAAAAAAAA! I have nothing to do!

I guess Im gonna have to go t o sleep.

-Syrus

P.S Im still not teird.

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_No. 7_

_Alright,what the hell has Syrus gotta us into now! First it was coming to this school with out even leting in controll,now he has us locked up in a fucking room!_

_WHAT THE HELL SYRUS! _

_I mean I tried to leave the room and the danm door was locked from the outside! For real!_

_Then I tryed to open a window but Im like four stories up,so the fall would probably kill me or break my legs or something._

_-sign-The shit that boy gets us me into. _

_I really didn't want to go to sleep so I dug around in that yellow bookbage Syrus carries around. I found this book and well got passed page 5 and then got borad....._

_It was like 3:55 a.m so I just decided to go to sleep._

_Yours Truely,_

_MARK_

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Nov. 7

Im out of the imformy and I still don't know why I had to stay the night. Something tells me I'll find out later.

You know,like my brother Zane says,that's what my gut is telling me.

-Syrus

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**Yes,Syrus will find out later. But is MARK about to be found out? Read chapter 10 and see!**


	10. WAiting and punishment

**Alright heres chapter 10 my readers! Wow! This story has gotten 30 reveiws! To be truthful I didn't think it would be that great. So I've been real happy with the out come. Just so you people know,Im planning on making the story 20 chapters or less. So if it's gonna be less the less number is 15.**

**So,yeah the people who are really loving this story don't worry because it is very fair from over!**

**Also,read the bottom for more info on when Im gonna update and stuff**

**I don't own anything.**

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Nov. 8

Im sitting in class. Well,waiting for class to start. We got here early because our morning jog was short. Plus,my watch broke and Im the only one who ever has a watch one so we didn't know the time.

So,umm yeah we have nothing to do. Hassleberry is trying to do the homework he didn't do last night and get the answers from me. I keep telling him no,if he wanted to know so bad he should have asked me last night.

Im really not a goody-goody but I don't like Hassleberry so I just don't want to let him have the answers. But I know he'll just get them from Aniki and all.

That's fine with me because Aniki never has the right answers,so he still want get the homework right. I know am evil.

* * *

Oh,my gosh! Your not gonna belive me! I just got called to the danm office again! That's unbeliveable! This is like the third or forth time this in two weeks!

I have to go right after class is over. -sign-again.

Oh,I have to go...class is about to start.

-Syrus

P.S In case you havn't notice when something stops me from writting in here I put little dashes.

* * *

Nov. 8

So umm..yeah I have to stay in the informy again. Infact thats where I am now. Miss. Fontaine made me go into a room right when I got here! I asked her "what about class?" She told me I wasn't going back to class! I asked her why and she told me that it had to do with last night. So umm..yeah,how does she know what I did last night?

But umm yeah she want let me leave and says I'll find out why when some doctor or something gets here or what ever...I don't know. All I know is since I don't have to go to class Im going back to sleep. I mean hey,I had to get up at the crack of don to go jog.

-Syrus

* * *

_Nov. 8_

_What the hell? Why am I in this room again? This is fucking nuts! _

_I mean I can't get the doors to open or anything! There isn't even a mother fucking T.V! _

_........I just relized that it's day time. I never get in controll during the day,whats going on here?_

_Either way,I gotta figure out how to get out of here._

_Danm you Syrus! Why the hell do you always get us into shit like this?! I should punush him for this. I think I will._

_Yours Truely,_

_MARK_

* * *

_Still Nov. 8_

_Im still in the room and Im still real pissed off at Syrus for getting us put in here! Like I said,I was going to puinsh him so I did._

_I know it's hurting myself too but It'll hurt him so it's like punishment for him because I njoy pain.  
I bit my arm! I mean I bit it till blood came out. _

_That's what he gets for getting us put in this room! Plus,It'l hurt like a bitch when he wakes up and I'll only feel it for a moment and like I said I like pain so that moment is heavebn to me._

_Yours Truely,_

_MARK_

* * *

**MARK you sick butthole! What will he do next? Why can't Syrus leave the room? What doctor is comeing? Read chapter 11 to find out!**

**Also,I wonder how many reviews I'll get in on this story in all. Maybe 56. That's my number estiament. But anyway,how many reviews do you think the story will get? Also,what do you think is going to happen and what do you think will happen to Syrus next cahpter? If you get it right "Ill message you.**


	11. A boat ride not wanted

**Hey,you guys! I didn't really get a lot of reviews on chapter 10 . Well,as many as I had hoped for for. =(**

**But hopefully this chapter will be better! Thanks you to all those who read and enjoy this story!  
I don't own anything! **

**Also,read the botto, for an announcement.**

* * *

Nov. 9

O.k it's real early. I just go up and I can't write long, I have to hurry up and get dressed and brush my teeth.

To make a long story short the nurse woke me up and told me that the Droctor was hear to see me and that I had to go see them right now!

That was it. I'll tell you more later.

* * *

Nov.10 I think?

I know I havn't wrote in forever but that's because I just got my journal back!

I"ll tell you all about it! First of all heres what happened with the doctor......

I get dressed and grabe my things and then I go into the nurses office and this doctor is there and so are my parents.

My Mom was about to brust into tears when I walked into the room. She kepted mumbeling something. I think it was my name and something about why? I don't know.

But I had a strange feeling about the doctor. She looked smart and like she tryed to be happy. But once I asked what was going on my mom started crying!

I just kepted asking what was wrong! Then the nurse said that Dr. Kelvin was going to help me. I was like what?  
I asked what she was going to help me with. And she just stands up and says she just wants to help me. Then my Mom starts crying and my dad just rolls his eyes at her.

The whole time I'm like _help me with what!_

Then when I just couldn't take it any more and yelled as hard as I could "WHATS GOING ON!? HELP ME WITH WHAT?"

Then everyone just knida looked at me and my Mom is like crying going oh,he's doing it again! I have no clue what I was doing!

But then,oh,but then... gets up and tells me that she wants to help me,and that I don't have to be scared. I was like what?  
Then guess what,the nurse is like Im gonna be safe where I'm going and I'll get help! I didn't get it till I asked Dr. Kelvin where she worked.

She said that didn't matter but I told her that she either told me or I wasn't going anywhere! Then she told me where she worked. I nearly passed out! She said she worked at Blue Ocean's Mental Hospital!

I couldn't belive it! My family and the teachers here thought I was crazy! So umm..yeah,you can guess how that went! To shorten it up,I started freaking out and telling them I wasn't nuts! This of corse leds to my mom crying so more and my Dad just shakeing his head. I then start screaming "I'M NOT CRAZY!" But then I got a needle or something in my arm! Then I passed out!

O.k theres more too!

I wake up and I'm on some boat or something. No,wait theres more! I was in a straight jacket!

I'm still on the boat. I got my journal back when one of the people came to check on me and they said I was being good and I wasn't causeing any harm so I could be let out of the straight jacket.

So,that's how Im writing. It's passed midnight I'm sure because everything outside is all calm and dark. You know how it is in the middle of the night.

I guess I'll reach the docks in the monring.

I already know where I'm going. To Blue Ocean's Mental Hospital! I still don't think I'm crazy! Heck,I know I'm not crazy! But at least when I get to the hospital I can explain all of this and they'll see me and send me home because I'm clearly sane!

But still I wonder what led the teachers and my parents to think I was crazy.

I'll figure it out later. Right now IM gonna try to sleep,something tells me I got a big day tomorrow.

-Syrus

* * *

_Nov. 10_

_O.k now I'm on a boat. WTF?  
Well,at lest I'm out of that room! But what am I doing on a boat. _

_This doesn't make sense because Syrus can't swim and would never go on a boat by himself! ( I'm in this little cramped room!)_

_The room I'm in is made up of a bed,tolite,sink,andthat's it. Well,besiedes a white jacket on the floor that's it._

_I can't get out of here! DANM IT! WHAT THE HELL SYRUS!_

_I mean it! I can't get out of here and cause any trouble! DANMIT! DANMIT! DANMIit! DANMIT! _

_I havn't done anything in forever! I havn't broke anything,or wrote on the walls,or or hurt anyone! I havn't had any fun in three whole days! That's way to long!_

_I'm so borad I've come to counting the cracks in the walls! _

_I'm gonna go ram the door and try to get out. _

_Yours Truely,_

_MARK_

* * *

_Nov. 10_

_Ramming the door didn't help. But this guy came in and said he was going to put me in some sort of jacket if I didn't stop it!  
I told him to bring it on! Coward!  
He lefted! Guess,I scared him!_

_Yours Truely,_

_MARK  
P.S Scaring that guy was so much fun! Well,the most fun I've had the pass three days!_

_P.S.S I wonder what a straight jacket is? I just remebered that's what the guy was going to go get. I'll just let Syrus go back in controll because something tells me I don't wanna be put in one._

* * *

**Yeah! Heres chapter 11! Hope you guys loved it! Please R & R!**

**Also,if you bothered to read the top then you heard I had an anouncement to make! The anouncement is,I have joined Fictionpress!**

**Yes,I will still write for ! I'll just also write for Fictionpress! If you want to know my account name on the sit message me. I'll tell. I thought I'd tell you guys in case you wanted to see some of my normal nofanfic works! **

**I'll be taking all my mic stories and mybe turn this story into a normal story. You know not a fanfic! =)**

**But who knows. Please R & R!**


	12. First day at Ocean Blue's!

**Hey,you guys! Hate to say it but I'm going back to school! Yeah,my break is over. -sign-**

**But I'll still be updating as well! So,I hope you all enjoy this little story!**

**I don't own anything!**

* * *

Nov.11

I'm at Ocean Blue's! Yup,just got here a few hours ago.

When me and the nut cases got a nurse got us and took us to our rooms. My nurse was like amrican or something. She was real pretty. With long brown hair with some blond in it,and she kinda tall with long legs! But that's not the point!

She made me go into the bathroom first thing. At first I was going to tell her I don't have to go but then she gave me these PJ's. Well,she gave me a white shirt and a pair of PJ's bottoms. She gave me some slippers and a some shoes.

I kepted asking to see the head or who ever was in charge of this nut house so I could tell them I didn't belong here and all but she told me I couldn't go anywhere till I changed! So,yeah I changed and she took me striaght to this room.

Well,she took me striaght to this room paced all these other rooms. I think mine was like room 42 or something. I don't know. She said I was on like leve one or two and that I could be moved up to leve three easly. Whatever that means......

But anyway,once I get into my room I was going to ask to see the head but before I can say anything she tells me that'll be seeing soon.

So,yeah....that's what Im doing right now. I'm waiting in my room to see the doctor who had me put here.

I wonder when I am going to get to see her anyway. I mean I've been sitting in here for hours on end!

I mean all there really is is a bed,a desk and chair and a T.V wich I can't find the remote too! Which really sucks cause I'm bored to tears here!

Oh,awesome! I just found the remote! YES!

Crap,the battiers are dead in it and the T.V's stuck on animal planet.

I'm just gonna watch a cheeta eat a little rat thing.

-Syrus

* * *

Nov.11

I just got done talking to doctor Kelvin. She said she was going to be my theriapest while I stayed here.

Then she told me to set down and all that jazz.

The very first thing she said was for us to start talking. I agreed of corse.

Then she asked if I knew why I was put here. I told her I was put here because she thinks I'm crazy!

She said she didn't want to call me crazy and I asked what would she call me then? Sane?

She then said I'm not really all that sane in away and then I told her then you think I'm crazy.

She then told me to change the subject. Then I asked why she thought I needed to come here!

She told me she had good reason to place me here and she asked my parents if they thought I should be placed here as well and they agreed!

Then I said,"Well,that still doesn't answer my qustion." She then told me because of al the things I did at school and mental health past.

I told her I didn't do anything to the school and that the only person in my family who ever really was crazy was my mother!

She told me to settle down and that she'd explain it all to me better.

Then she kinda repeated what she said before just added stuff onto it. If I remeber right this is what she said,

"You have been put here because of the things that have gone on at the school and such. They point to you and once I saw the tap of you trashing a teachers room and then spoke to your father and step-mother we sat down and decided that this is what would be best for you."

I told her me trashing a room isn't a good reason to send me to a nut house! She told me that that isn't the reason.

Then beofre I could even get the reason she told me that she'd be helping me threw all this and that I'd have days where I can have my parents come to the sections me and her have.

That I could have vistors and such. That I'd be safe and stuff here and that it wasn't going to be that bad.

Then before I can protest our time was up and she gets these two big guys to bring me back to my room!

So,yeah I'm still in my room and I got sick of watching animal planet so I decided to write in this journal!

I'll tell you more later.

-Syrus

* * *

Nov.11

I know this is the third time I have wrote in you today journal but I need too. It's been one long day and it's not even close to over yet!

I just got back from dinner and let me tell you the food here isn't the best. But it's better than Dorthy's at least!

No,I'm for real it is. I can swallow it and it will really stay in my stomach and not come back up! I don't know if it's gonna hurt my "lower digestive parts" like Dorthy's food did at first. I know that's gross but I just had to say it!

But like right after dinner I was going to go back to my room when that nurse of mine came and got me. She asked if I was teird. I told her no.

Then she asked if I wanted to go to the wreck room for the paitents. To be truthful I thought she was going to give me some pills or something! But anyway,I told her that I'd just go to the wrek room.

Once I got there I meet some intersting people!

Let me tell you,some of the people here are REAL nut jobs! I mean it!

Here I'll tell you everyone I've meet today....

There was this one girl and she looked kinda shaggy and all the nurses called her smoke. -fit her too- She was in for drugs and depression. She was nice. I did a puzzle with her.

Then there was this one guy who had straight hair but it was light brown. He was kinda tall kinda short,I don't know. But he thought he was a wolf or a dog or something! Accoreding to a nurse he's been in here for a year or two! He freaked me out because he wouldn't leave me alone! But I got rid of him by throwing a piece of balled up paer and yelling fetch!

Then there was this one kid and they had long black hair and I guess this was a girl,maybe. But they where there for trying to kill themselves! But then I meet the same person but only as a boy and it turned out they where twins and the other one was there because they thought they where a vampire!

So,yeah I"ve meet some real characters today.

But then I just went back to my room after I did the puzzle with smoke.

I just sat there and watched T.V forever.

Animal Planet has a lot of dog shows on aat eight at night. Whats worse is if you watch them enought you get real sucked into them and start hoping that the winner dog will kick the poodle's butt!

Trust me that's what I'm hoping for.....

I'm gonna write later my hand is hurting.

-Syrus

* * *

Nov. 11

It's real late and I'm missing the guys. I wonder what their doing right now. I wonder if anyone told them where I m or what happened!

I miss them a lot. I feel like crying. But tha want do me any good. I mean their miles away in the middle of the sea and I'm here. In God know's how fair away I am from them!

Man,why do I always start crying! I just said I wasn't going to cry but now I have the whole page socked!  
I'm gonna go before I get the whole page wet!

-Syrus

* * *

Nov. 12

It's like one in the morning and I just got up. My eyes hurt from crying.

Yeah, when I was crying the same nurse who brought me to this room and showed me the wreck room came in and gave me some pills or something.

At first I didn't want them and I todl her I didn't. But she told me they would help me sleep and that I needed some sleep.

So, I took them and lied down. The nurse tucked me in too. I like her she's real nice. I need to find out her name. I think I'll ask next chance I get.

I'm still pretty teird and I'm still missing the guys and wishing I was at DA or at my home,any wher but here really.

But I think I can get threw the night.

-Syrus

* * *

**Chapter 12! WOOT! WOOT! Hope you all loved it! Yes,no MARK in this chapter. It was really just Syrus talking about his first day at the hopsital.**

**No,one minds that right. **

**Well,this probly answers a lot of things because all the reviews where really just a lot of "**_**Wow! Syrus is going to the loney bin! I wonder how he will cop!"**_

_**OR "Poor,SY. ; ( " Or "They's getting him commented. I was afreid this was going to happen soner or later."**_

**Yeah,this chapter is to answer those buring qustions! Also,poor Sy. Hopefully,he will make some friends and such. Maybe he'll kearn about MARK soon? **

**Lets hope the good Doctor well help him. **

**Also,just so people know I based the nurse of of my looks and such. =) I like Syrus so I made him call me pretty. =) Don't say you wouldn't have done the same!**

**Hope you enjoyed the story R & R!**


	13. MARK is back!

**Dear lord help me! CHAPTER 13!!!!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!**

**Syrus : What's wrong with chapter 13?**

**Me : I advoice it.**

**Syrus : o.k.......why?**

**Me : Because it's unlucky and I was 13 when my step-dad died!**

**Syrus : Oh,I see**

**Me : Hopefully I'll make it threw the chapter. **

**I don't own a thing!**

* * *

Nov. 12

You know what sucks about being in a mental hospital? Well,becides being in the mental hospital.....

Is they make you get up early!

The same nurse woke me up at like eight! I was so danm teird! I asked if I had to get up and the nurse told me I had too.

Then I was going to go shower and stuff,because I have a morning funk smell to me when I don't shower the night before. -Which I didn't get to do-

But like when I get to the bathroom doors there locked! I spent like five mintents trying to open a locked door because I thought it was stuck!  
Then one of the orderlys came and unlocked the door for me.

I said "thank you" and he said,"I'm used to it."

But look the very moment I step foot in the showers a nurse comes and grabes me and tells me that I can shower after breakfast!  
The breakfast here isn't that good. I mean I couldn't tell what I was being given!

Maybe it was otameal because it tasted like otameal. Sorta....

But anyay,I got my breakfast down and I went back to my room. I figure I could sleep a little before I have to go shower.

-Syrus

* * *

Nov.12 ( again)

I just had my second section with doctor Kelivn.

It went better than the last one thank the lord.

We just sat down and talked. I remeber what it was like,heres how it went down....

Dr. Kelivn : So Syrus how was your first day here?

Me : ....fine.

: That's good. Are you getting setteled in?

Me : No,not really.

: Well,I'm sorry to hear that.

Me : How long am I going to have to be here?  
: Till,you get better dear.

Me : So I should get comfortable...

:That would be best.

Me : -sign-

: Lets talk about something else.

Me : Like what?

:Well,what's your family like?

Me : Well,my mom and dad broke up when I was real little.

Dr. Kelvin : Really. Did they fight a lot?

Me : No,..it had to do with my mom......

: I see. Do you mind if I asked what she did?

Me : Not really,I don't get upset about it any more. You see I had an older sister named,Katie. But my mom went crazy one day and....and.....

: Hw about we change the subject?

Me : Yeah,that's a good idea.

: Did you like school?  
Me : Yeah,kinda. I mean I got picked on and stuff but my friends a DA where awesome!

: Really....what where their names?

Me : Jaden,thats my best friend,Zane,thats my big brother,Hassleberry,he's so-so,Alexis,she is really pretty and s mart and.....

: You have an older brother?

Me : Yes,ma'ma. I really look up to him.

: I see.

Me : Does he know where I am?  
: I'm sure your parents would have told him, Oh,our time is up,I'll see you tomorrow.

Me : Aright!

Yeah,that section went lots better than the last one!

* * *

Nov.12

I in the wreck room. I'm pretty sleepy,too.

I just had dinner and then I had to take these pills.  
I have no clue what their for,either. They wouldn;t tell me. But I did get some what of an answer when I asked the nurse who's been nice to me.

She said they where to make sure I behaved. I really have no clue what that means.

I gotta go,I can hardly keep my eyes open.

-Syrus

* * *

_Nov.12_

_WHAT THE HELL! I'M IN AN INSANE ASULYM! WHAT THE FUCK?_

_I LEAVE SYRUS IN CONTROLL ON THE BOAT AND THIS IS WHERE HE GETS US! THAT LITTLE PUNK!_

_I MEAN I WAKE UP IN A ROOM FULL OF NUT JOBS! _

_I'LL TELL YOU RIGHT NOW I'M NOT STAYING! _

_YOURS VERY ANGERY,_

_MARK!_

* * *

_NOV. 12_

_THEY WANT LET ME LEAVE! NO,FOR REAL THEY WANT! I JUST ASKED THEM TO LET ME OUT !_

_THEY SAID THEY HAD ALL READY BEEN OVER THIS WITH ME AND THE ANSWERS WAS STILL NO!_

_I'LL TELL YOU RIGHT NOW I'M NOT GOING TO STAND FOR THIS! NO ONE KEEPS ME LOCKED UP! NO ONE!_

_YOURS TRUELY,_

_MARK_

* * *

**Me : I made it threw chapter 13!**

**Syrus : See,you could do it!**

**Me : Yeah and aslo,** **What is MARK planning? What is going to happen to Syrus now that MARK has come out once again?**

**read the next chapter to find out!**


	14. Time out room and the first good day

**Hey,everyone heres chapter 14! Thank you so much for waiting on the updates! **

**And nice reviews! ;)**

**I won nothing!**

**Also, sorry if Syrus gets a bit OOC. **

* * *

Nov. 13

Alright it's my third day here and no one has come to see me.

I'm not being thinking that some one will be seeing me every day, but I figured my parents or maybe even Zane or Karen would have come!

I mean I havn't seen my parents since that day at DA!

And to be truthful,and as much as it makes me sound like a baby,I want my mommy!

Well,I don't want "MY" mom. I want my step-mom.

My real Mom is crazy as hell and she spent years in a mental place like this!

My step-mom has been my mother and I call her mom.

Oh,no! I couldn't be crazy like my mom could I?! Dear lord I hope I don't spend years in here like she did!

-Syrus

* * *

Nov.13 ( again)

I just had another section with . It was't a good section. But I don't think could call it a bad one either.

I remeber it and since I have nothing better to do I'm gonna telly ou all about it!

: So,how's your day been going Syrus?

Me : Pretty good I guess.

: Have yo had any..umm..troubles?

Me : What do you mean by that?

Dr. Kelvin : Oh,I ment about the back outs.

Me : What black outs?

: You know. How you said you got bacl outs and when you woke something bad had happened that pointed to you.

Me : ....How'd you know about that!?!

: It was in your diary.

Me : You read my diary!

: Well,the doctors here do that to make sure our patients are alright.

Me : That isn't right!  
: Let's change the subject.

Me : No,lets find out why you read my diary and lets m-give me a good answers!

: Well,have you come to terms with being here yet?

Me : What do you mean by that?

Dr. Kelvin: I mean do you knwo why you're here?  
Me : No.  
Dr. Kelvin: *sigh* I want you to understand...  
Me: You and everyone else thinsk I'm insane. _I_ undersatnd perfectly; it's the rest of you who don't.  
Dr. Kelvin: I want to help you.  
Me: No...I don't think you do. If you wanted to help, you'd listen to my side.  
Dr. Kelvin: Maybe after some group theropy-  
Me: You don't even care what I'm saying to you, do you?  
Dr. Kelvin: Art theropy.  
Me: ..what?  
Dr. Kelvin: How about art theropy? You can relax, express yourself...maybe even perk up your spirits a bit. Me : Well...I guess. Dr. Kelvin : Great! I'll tell doctor Kiruyo that you'll be coming!

So,that was pretty much the whole section. I agreed to give the art theropy thing a try. I mean that has to be beter than group theropy! Which doesn't help at all! All we do in that is sit around and talk about how mcuh our lives suck! -Mine doesn't-

-Syrus

* * *

_Nov.13_

_Remeber how I said no one locks me up. Well,now it's pay back time!_

_Yours Truely,_

_MARK_

* * *

_Nov. 13_

_I got my payback, alright. -wink-wink-_

_After I wrote the last entery I went into walking around and found a werk room! It was perfect! It had tons of stuff in it and doctors and pataints! Perfcet. _

_I walked into the room all sholont and all then I grabed a book from the shelf. It was one of those really big books too,you know the ones that are like 2,000 words on each page! Then I throw the book into the T.V! When the nut jobs who where watching it got up I punched them in the faces and took a coch pellow and jumped on top of one of them and held a pellow over his face! HAHAHAHAH! _

_Some of the doctors came over and tryed to grabe me but I was able to sled out of their grip and out run them!_

_I made it back to my room! _

_Yours Truely,_

_MARK_

_P.S I think I'll Syrus get back in controll. I don't really want to deal with those doctors. _

* * *

Nov. 14

I had the worset night ever!

I woke up in my room,which was really weird because I don't remeber falling asleep in here,and these two big guys came in and put me in a striaght jacket! They just barged in and tackeled me to the ground! I then get FORCED into a straight jacket and then I get throw in what was called the "time out room" . The time out room is really a room with padded walls and one window that you can't even look out of because it's to high!

I spent the whole night in there! My arms hurt do bad when I woke up, I started crying! I mean it felt like they where going to fall off! I got let out of the "time out room" around 12 in the afternoon. I know it was 12 becuse that's when we have to eat our lunch.

Afterwards I just went and ate lunch and went back to my room! I have another section with doctor Kelvin in an hour then I have to do that Art theropy thing.

I ould rather lay in bed, and skip all of that but I know I can't because someone would come get me and I'd get in trouble with .

-Syrus

* * *

Nov. 14(again)

It's dinner time right now and I've had a pretty good day! No, I'm not lieing! I had a good day!

I went to the art theropy thing and it was kinda fun. I mean we had to paint a really stupide topic but it was fun. -the topic was,paint what your life would be like if it was happy- I painted me and my family. Only my dad was home and my step-mom was my real mom,Zane wasn't Hell Kiaser and my twin sister was being all cocky! So yeah,that would be my life it was happy. Oh,also I wans't in a mental hospital! Oh,and we had dog instead of that mean ass cat Boots! -My family has had that cat since I was around 6,about a year after I started having the back outs,and Boots is a mean cat! She has blond fur and these blue eyes that make her look all nice but that cat is Satan!-

Then I go to the section with and guess what? My step-mom and Dad where there! I was so happy I ran right up to them! They hugged me and my mom-I call my step-mom mom remeber- kepted kissing me! We did like family thing! Like I still did the section only my family was there and I had to tell them what was going on and they told me everything that had gone on since I lefted.

After the theropy thing I thought my parents where going to leave but they got to stay! We did a puzzle together and watched some T.V! They lefted like an hour later but promised to call me or come see me soon!

I'm in bed now. I'm sleepy and I thought I"d write this down to give somethingt o read.

-Syrus

P.S I didn't tell my parents about the 'time out room thing' neither did doctor Kelvin.

* * *

**theres chapter 14! Hope you all loved it! Also,Boots is based off of my best friend who loves cats! She can be kinda mean sometimes so I made her BOOTS!**


	15. MARK's day out!

**Hey people! Heres chapter 15! **

**Also,thank you Fluffy~the~wolf~ from DEVANTART! She has been helping me and she helped me with this chapter!**

**I don't own anything! **

* * *

Nov. 15

I have another section with doctor kelvin today and I think my parents are coming to see me again. I'm not to sure.

To be truthful I don't want to go to the section. And I'd rather just stay in bed all day than do puzzles with my flocks. I know that it'd be time out of my room and all but I'm not feeling so good to day.

I mean my stomach hurts pretty bad and I feel like I could throw up. My head hurts too and I'm strting to feel dizzy.

I think I'm gonna stop writting and get some rest.

-Syrus

* * *

_Nov. 15_

_Alright! I've had enought of being here! I mean I wake up and I'm still in bed. _

_So I get up and wonder into the wreck room. _

_I was going to cuse some trouble but it feels like two fat drunk collge guys are partying in my stoamch so I decided to just take it easy today._

_So yeah I sit down and grabe a book to read and some nurse comes up to me and says my parents are here to see me._

_I was like what?_

_Anyway,I just sat there. I mean I don't have any parents so she had me mixed up with someone else. _

_But anyway she told me to come on and I told her she had the wrong person!  
But of corse she had to be one of those people who you can't tel anything too and she grabed me by the arm and drages me out of the wreck room!_

_She tells to set down and my parents would be with me shortly._

_I figured there wasn't a point in agrueing and I didn't feel so good, seeing how those two guys where starting to break dance,so I just decided to read while I wiated on my so called "parents"._

_When they got there will heres what happened........_

_S_yrus's Mom: Syrus  
Me: *does not look up* ...  
Syrus's Dad : Syrus, we're here to se you.  
Me: ...  
_S_yrus's Mom: Sweetie, are you alright?  
Me: ... *slowly looks up at them* ...my name...is not...Syrus.  
Syrus's Dad: What?  
_S_yrus's Mom: What's the matter?  
Me: You are addressing me by the wrong name. I am Mark. Your "Syrus" si still sleeping.  
Syrus's Dad: Are youi angry at us?  
ME: I'm angry at Syrus for stranding me here. Little bastard can't do anything right. Always trying to end things...always getting caught...now this.  
_S_yrus's Mom: Syrus, please don't scare us like this.  
Me: Scared? *chuckle* If _this_ scares you, i'd hate to see your raection to waht's in store.  
Syrus's Dad Waht are you talking about?  
Me: it doesn't matter. Not in your case, anyway.  
_S_yrus's Mom: Sho, please-  
Me: I told you...I'm not Syrus. I'm Mark. Get it right, you worthless bitch.  
_S_yrus's Mom: *gasps, looks hurt*  
Syrus's Dad: SYRUS!!  
Me: My name...IS MARK!!!

I kinda hit Syrus's Dad in the gut with my book after that...... Then these two nig guys came and dragged me aways from them. Then they put me in some-sort of jacket again and threw me into the room with the padded walls.

Well,I got out of the padded room like three hours ago and then I had to go to see that doctor. What was her name agian? ? No,. *Smerk*

And since I liike to write about what I say to people I'll tell you what our section was like......

Kelvin : Why hellow Syrus. Me : Why does everyone keep calling me that?! Kelvin : Because it's your name. Me : NO! NO,it's not! My name is MARK! M-A-R-K! MARK! Kelvin : Oh,so your Syrus's other-half. Me : I guess yo u could call me that. Kelvin : Can I ask you something MARK? Me : Fire away! -I decided to have a little fun with my answers. Kelvin: Do you think it's funny to do these things?  
Me: *eyes trail off to the side* ...  
Kelvin: Mark?  
Me: *looks back at her* You ever notice how when people go on a diet, all they do is complain? I mean, what's the point?  
Kelvin: Don't change the subject. Just answer the question.  
Me: You're a doctor, right? Tell me; what's the difference between a hemorrhoid and a hemorrhage?  
Kelvin: Mark!  
Me: Just asking. I always mix them up.  
Kelvin: Do you enjoy being difficult?  
Me: You seem jittery. What kind of coffee have you been drinking?  
Kelvin: *sigh*

After that she got fed up with me and had these graudes take me back to my room.

Well,that's about all I did all day.

Yours truely,

MARK

* * *

**There you havhe it! Chapter 15! I had a case of writer's block when I wrote this. -_- So sorry if it wasn't that good. If you have any ideas at all fo r chapter 16 please tell me. **

**I have something planned out but if your idea is better please tell me.**

**Also,please review! Or MARK will come and get you!**


	16. Jaden to the almost rescue!

**Sorry for not updating in so long. But heres chapter 16 and all that jazz! **

**I don't own anything!  
______________________________________________________________________________**

Nov. 17

I feel lots better. I didn't get to write at all yesterday because I was still sick.

Yeah..I was pretty sick. I even throw up...on a nurse.

But anyway,thats not the point....I got my stomach back in order last night but I'm still pretty queasy.

So I'm gonna watch what I eat.

I don't remeber a thing from the past two days! I remeber pucking my guts out yesterday but I can't really remeber the day beore that.

I remeber feeling sick and going to sleep but that's it.

I'll write later,I got up real early and I have to go eat breakfast.

-Syrus

* * *

Nov. 17

Your not gonna belive who showed up to see me today!

Guess! Did you guess it? NO. Well,let me tell you....JADEN!

JADEN OF ALL PEOPLE SHOWED UP TO SEE ME!

I was so happy!

I was just resting on the sofa in the wreck room and I feel someone tap me on the shoulder. I turn around thinking it's gonna be some dotcor or a nurse or somethign and theres Jaden!

I nearaly fell off the sofa in shock! Well,I kinda did fall off the sofa but that's not the point.

Jaden had on like a doctor's coat and stuff! He was real happy to see me!

I asked him what he was doing here and he said to see me.

Then I asked what was he doing in a doctor's coat.

He told me the doctors wouldn't let him in,said something like I wasn't in the right state of mind and that only family could see me.

So,he said he sneaked in and got a doctor's coat and went and ofund me!

I just laughed. I mean that is such a Jaden thing to do! But the thing the doctor's said about me....I don't think I was ever told of my mental state.

Which I shouldn't have one because I'm not a nut job!

But anyway back to me and Jaden!

At first we just talked on the sofa,but after a while we both got pretty bored and tryed to do a puzzle. Which come to think of it was a bad idea because Jaden always loses the pieaces to the puzzles.

So we just went outside for a while. Which was easy to do since the people thought Jaden was a doctor!  
Plus,I love going outside and I never get to stay outside that long. I get a twenty min. break out doors like two times a week.

So when we got outside I was bouncying off the walls!

Jaden made me sit down for like five min. At first he thought I was on some weird meds or it was hospital food messing with me. -like too much sugar in it- but then I told him I just don't get outside much and I was really happy to be outside and stuff!

He got it and told me that he would stay outside as long as I wanted.

We mainly just walked around or I ran and Jaden had to cah up with me. -That's a first-

But anyway, it took like thirty min. before I ran out of breath and had to take a rest. Jaden I could tell was happy I had slowed down.

-severs him right for never waiting up for me when he out runs me-

We just layed down in the grass and talked. I asked Jaden how he found out I was here.

Jaden told me that at first he thought maybe I was sick and that I was in the nurses station at school. But after a few days he said he went to check on me and found out I wasn't there. He said he got real worried and ask the nurse and she told him that I was real sick. He said at first he thought she ment I had been like sick with a cold like sickness and asked if I was at the hospital. She told him that I was sent here. Jaden said at first he didn't belive her and stuff but after a while he siad he did.

So he waited till exam week and got a boat and came here.

I just laughted at the fact that he'd wait till exam week to skip school and come see me.

But then we got on about what it was like to have to stay here and I told him that it wasn't the best place in the world.

I told Jaden that I had to go to section and stuff and art theropy and had to be asleep by eleven.

Jaden then asked how the food was. I told him better than slife food but not as good as my mom's.

We went back inside after that. I mean I loved being outside but it was hot out and stuff and I was ready to come in.

Right when we came in however was waiting on us. She asked why I messed my sectiona nd I was like I went outside with a doctor.

She then was like that's not a doctor and one guy said I told you not to come in!

After,that Jaden had to leave and I had to go to section ART THEROPY! Which by the way still gives me retarded things to draw.

I did not want to draw my place. And I got in trouble for not drawing it! I couldn't draw it because I don't have a happy place.

-sign- When I got out of art theroy I just asked my nurse for sleeping pills. I told her I my stomach hurt and that I wanted to go to sleep but couldn't becasue of it.

She just gave me some pills and told me to go lay down on the sofa or go to my room.

That is a nice nurse. She isn't mean like most of the nurses here. Like the one I wound up puking on yesterday! She yelled at me like crazy and grabed me and throw me back in my room and said,"DON'T COME OUT TILL YOUR WELL!" I got her name...It was like Sam. She had blonde hair and glasses. I got the name of the nurse who is nuce to me. Her name was Jamie.

Well,I'm gonna go.

-Syrus

* * *

**There you have it! Chapter 16! **

**People : *Claps***

**ME : *BOWS***

**O.k yes, like I said before I'm Sy's nurse. The mean nurse is my best friend. I made her the mean nurse because she was rud to me over the phone when I called and tryed to tell her SCARY MOVIE WAS ON!**

**Well,REVIE PLEASE OR ELSE! I WILL HURT SYRUS NEXT CHAPTER!  
Syrus : WHAT! Really?  
Me : No,that;s just so they'll review.**

**Syrus : O.k**

**Me : *looks and sees you* Umm...hi...review please! *grabes Sy and leaves***


	17. Syrus finds out!

**WOOT! WOOT! Here's chapter 17! **

**And Syrus is about to get the shock of his life! **

**I don't own anything!  
_________________________________________________________________________________**

Nov. 18

I have another section with !

I slept late so I have to get dresses go eat some breakfast and go to the section and then art theropy. Which I still hate.

But at least I can go outside today!

So yeah,I just wrote this real fast becasue I wanted to but now I have to go.

-Syrus

P.S I'm gonna find out why I'm here this time! I mean it! I'm sick of this becasue you blong here or because your sick crap!

* * *

Nov. 18

I HATE ! I MEAN IT TOO! I HATE DOCTOR KELIVN!

When we were having our section she asked how I was doing and all that stuff but like right after she said that I asked why I was here!

She was about to say because you or your something but I cut her off and tols her I wanted the REAL reason!

She then told me because I have a disorder.

I asked her what kind of disorder and she told me that she would make it easier for me to understand better later on.

I told her I wanted the answers right then and there! -Yeah,I know yelling really isn't gonna get you no where in this place,it'll get you some pills shoved down your throat but it want get you anywhere.- but then she told me that she was going to do something before she told me what I was asking for.

I just kinda gave up after that. I mean she isn't gonna listen to me! The other doctors and nurses want listen to me and they all treat me like a nut job so I met as well just let the doctors do whatever.

I mean whatever gets me out out of this place faster.

But anyway,I just told her to do whatever she had to do.

Then she told me that after all my theropys and stuff today that she'd come and see me.

I just told her o.k.

I'm outside right now and it's still really hot so I didn't want to run around or anything like that.

But I guess I'll find out what Dr. Kelvin wants to do with me.

-Syrus

* * *

Nov. 22

I said it once and I'll say it again, I HATE !

What she did was take my freaken journal!

Yeah,she wanted to read it or something!

So I just got it back!

She told me to go back and re read the enterys.

I don't get what that was about.

But I'll do it later. Right now I gotta go.

I have like group theropy,which I have to go to since I've been skipping it.

-Syrus

* * *

Nov. 23

O.k as werid as it seems I think something may be wrong with me!

I mean I did flip threw the past enterys! And their are lots I don't remeber putting in! I mean they don't even sound like me!  
They even have a different name signed to them!

It's really freaky because I don't know anyone named Mark-that's the name signed-and some of them a very new!  
I don't know but their in like my hand writting so it's real weird.

I wonder if knew about this!

I'm gonna ask her at my section today.

-Syrus

* * *

Nov. 23

I'm freaking out! There is something really wrong with me!

I found out in my section today!

Look heres how it went :

: How are you doing today? -she asks that like every freaking section-

Me : Doctor Kelvin...I read my journal enterys and stuff and......

Dr. Kelivn : And?

Me : ...I found someone else's entery's!  
: Is that so....

Me : YES! There in my hand writting but they have a different name signed to them and everything!

doctor Kelivn they aren't mine! They are say stuff I would never say and-!

: Syrus,remeber how I said you have a disorder?

Me : Y-yes.

: I asked you to read your enterys so you could see that you have one. Sweetie you have SPD.

Me : I have what now?

: SPD. Split Personality Disorder.

Me : gulp. W-whats that mean?

Dr. Kelvin : Well,to say it striaght forward you have another person in your head.

Me : WHAT!?!

: Calm down.

Me : HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CALM DOWN? I HAVE SOMEONE ELSE IN MY HEAD THAT IS PURE EVIL JUDGE ING BY THOSE ENTERYS!

: O.k sweetie take a deep breath and listen to me.

Me : Takes breath.

: You have most likely had this for a while. I'm guessing it was brought on by something. I have to ask have you ever seen something or been threw something very tramica. Thay you may have bolocked out for a little while.

Me : No...well....

: Well?

Me : When I was about four....my mom went nuts! She shot my older sister! She shot her right in front of me and my brother and sister!

: I see....that's problemly what caused "MARK" to start coming. You seeing that was to much and that's when he came.

Me : Mark?

: The name of your other half. The other person in your head.

Me : Oh....how do I get rid of him!

: Well,he'll go away with time. Once,you learn to stop letting him take over which will take time. And of corse you'll go on meds and such.

Me : .......All those things that happened at school....they where Mark wheren't they?

: Yes,sweetie.

: Go get some rest. I'l talk to you tomorrow.

That's what happened. So now I know...I really am a nut job and I do belong here.

I'm gonna go to bed. I don't want to be awake anymore.

-Syrus

* * *

**Syrus found out! What'll happen next? Read to find out!  
REVIEW PLEASE!**


	18. Pills

**Hey,guys! I'm back with another update!Sorry,for not updating in so long but now I"m out for Chrismas break! Till the 5th!**

**So there will be tons of updates! Maybe the story will even get finshed!**

**Also,I'd like to give a big thanks to my good friend from DevantART ~fluffy~the~wolf~**

**she helped me with this chapter and if she hadn't I may not have even contunied it! =O**

**But before before I go on about how I don't own anything may I wish you all HAPPY HOILDAYS!**

**I DON'T OWN ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS SHOW! IF I DID IT WOULD HAVE BEEN WOULD HAVE BEEN FULL OF STUFF LIKE THIS!**

* * *

Nov. 26

Sorry,for not writing in so long. But I"ve been pretty down since I found out about Mark.

I havn't wanted to do much of anything. I havn't even wanted to eat,or go outside or talk to my friends or parents.

I've just wanted to sleep.

But I stopped sleeping lately. I mean if I go to sleep then Mark comes out. Well,I figured thats when he comes out.

-sign- I have another section with .

So I'm gonna go.

-Syrus

* * *

Nov. 26

I just got back from my section with .

It went alright. We talked and she gave me some meds to keep Mark at bay.

Here's how the section went.......

: So how are you today?

Me : Fine....just a little teird.

: Not sleeping well?  
Me : Not sleeping.

: Oh,and why is that?

Me : Because when I sleep Mark comes out!

Dr. Kelvin : I have to ask you something......

Me : ...what?

Dr. Kelvin : You never knew about MARK?

Me : How come no one ever told me?

: Maybe no one else knew untill recently.

Me : How is it possible?

Dr. Kelivn : How is what possible?  
Me : Everything! I can't remeber any of the things he did!

Me : H-has he ever hurt you?!

: Your gonna be o.k .

Me : No,I'm not! No,I"m not!

: We're gonna help you.

Me : When was anyone going to tell me about Mark? Why does he even exiast?

: Remeber how you told me about how your mother went nuts and shot your sister.

Me : Y-yeah.....

: Well,that's problemly why Mark exiast. You supressed that mermory and that caused Mark come.

Me : Oh....Oh perfect this is all my fault then.

: No one is saying that!

Me : Well,no one isn't!

: Syrus...this isn't your fault.

Me : ........then who's is it?

: It's no one's fault,dear.

Me : ....I guess.......b-but.....

: But?  
Me : What has Mark done?

: What do you mean by that?

Me : I mean how many people has he hurt?!

: Well,MARK has beat a few people up here....he has hurt people too.

Me : WHO?

: Well,he has slapped your step-mother before and he has tripped nurses before.

Me : .........gulp...........

: Syrus I want you too take these pills.

Me : ....pills?/

: Yes. Take two a day...one right after ART THEROPY today and another right after dinner. They'll help keep Mark at bay.

Me : ...alright.

Dr,Kelvin : Alright then,I"ll see you tomorrow.

So,yeah I did what told me too. To be truthful these pill are pretty big....but not too big to swallow.

I feel a little a better after taking them. My mind isn't raceing.

I feel real calm and relaxed.

* * *

_Nov. 27_

_It's real late._

_Damn! I could bearly get in controll!_

_I fucking hate this place!_

_I just found these pills! I think their trying to get rid of me!_

_Well,first of all it'll take more than a couple of pills a day to get rid of me!_

_Second of all,how dare Syrus take these!_

_I HAVE to punshie him for this! _

_I'll write back after I punshie Syrus for this awful action!_

_YOURS TRUELY,_

_MARK!_

* * *

_Nov. 27_

_I"m a man of my word. So you can guess what I'm writing back to say....._

_Yes,I punshied Syrus for this._

_At first I was going to get rid of the pills,but then I figured he'd just get some more so getting rid of the pills is just useless._

_Then I going to bit his arm-well our arm-again but then I remebered that he really didn't care the last time I did it.-guess he didn't care or fgrued he had done it-_

_So then I had to pace the floor thinking of something to do._

_But then I found some sessires! They sharp ones too._

_I guess Syrus had them in his backpack and they never found them! _

_So I took those and cut Sy's wrists and made a few cuts on his stomach!_

_Pretty soon I had blood on the sessires and stuff._

_I got cleaned up and now I'm going to bed._

_YOURS TRUELY,_

_MARK  
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Dec. 5

I'm sorry for not writing in so long but I just got off of sucide watch!

I woke up about a week ago all cut up!

So I got put on sucide watch!

I just got off of it too.

I wasn't taking those pills the whole time and let me tell you once you get off of those things their was a side effect no one bothered too tell me!

You start to get awful headachs and you throw up! Plus,you start too hear things and one side effect can be seeing things that arn't there!

So yeah,I started acting crazy than I really was!

I even started banging my head on the walls trying to make voices stop!

But once I got off sucide watch and they let me have the pills again I felt better and it all went away within the hour.

What's worse is when I was acting all nuts from side effects my step-mom came too see me and Zane had even came once I think!

So yeah......I think Zane just lefted and my step-mom started crying becasue she thought I had gotten worse.

This is all that Mark's fault! I just know it!

I HATE MARK! MY FAMILY HATES MARK! HECK MY FAMILY SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH MARK!

Maybe.....maybe if I'm gone...then they'll be happier.

Yeah....if I die then Mark dies.....I wouldn't have to put my family and friends threw this anymore.

If I kill myself then I'll kill Mark with me.

I gotta go.....I got some thinking too do....

-Syrus

* * *

**Chapter 18!**

**Woot! Woot! Once, again thank you FLUFFY THE WOLF! **

**So will Sy kill himself? Find out next chapter!**

**REVIEW! OR ELSE MAYBE SY WILL COMMENT SUCIDE!**


	19. Final decision

**I'm back! so heres chapter 19!**

**I don't own anything!**

* * *

Dec. 7

I've thought it all threw!

If I kill myself then Mark will die with me!

So yeah,I"m gonna kill myself.

I know that it's stupid thing to do,but I mean I'm doing it for a good reason!

I'm gonna get rid of MARK and end my family's suffering!

Plus, I kinda got to kill myself to do it.

I mean it would take years to get rid of MARK! So that would be like five to ten more years all locked up in here!

Also,I kinda can't just wait to die. I mean I'm sixteen! How many sixteen year olds just die!

Not many.

So yeah....I'm just gonna kill myself.

I know my family and friends will be sad and stuff but they'll get over it!

Cause I mean lets face it. I wasn't really going any where with my life, and besides they'll always have photos and stuff.

Pretty soon that's all be. Someone in an old photo.

But anyway,I got to go to eat lunch so I'll write later.

-Syrus

P.S I haven't figured out yet,how I'm gonna kil myself.

* * *

**Yeah,I know what a short chapter!**

**But trust me,chapter 20 will be so much longer and better!**

** Please R&R!**


	20. The note

**Hey,you guys I'm back! Sorry for not updating in such a long time. But It's busy since with all the X-mas shopping nd stuff.**

**Also, I hope everyone is enjying Chrismas Eve! This is my little Chrismas preasent to you guys! ****Merry Chrismas!**

**I don't own yugioh gx! Maybe I'll get it for Chrsimas. **

* * *

Dec. 8

I figured out how I'm gonna kill myself and when!

Well,I don't have a set date but I want to do this before Chrismas so my family want be burying me on the happiest day of the year.

I know how I"m gonna do it!

I have already started!

You know those pills they make me take!

Well,they give me two a day!

So I'm gonna save up on those! And when I have enough I'll just take then all!

I figured I could get some sleeping pills too,since if you can't sleep they give one.

I got it figured out!

And so fair I have four pills!

Two are my meds,one is a sleeping pill,and the other an aspirin I got for faking a head ache!

I'm on my way

-Syrus

* * *

Dec. 9

Ooohhh......my head is racing.

I'm getting those awful sideffects like last time.

I havn't been taking my meds remember.

I'll b e alright. I just got to bear it for a little while.

-Syrus

* * *

Dec. 15

Yeah.....I went a little nuts again from sideffects.

Instead of suicide watch I got moved up to level three or something.

I got put in the time out room like every day,in fact my arms are still sore from the last time.

I even have bandages on my head from banging my head on the wall again.

But the good news is I have almost enough pills!

I'm just a couple days away from having enough!

So I don't know when I'll write again since I'm still getting these awful sideeffects and I just got my head clear enough to write.

-.....Syrus

Sorry,I forgot my name for a minute. Dare sideffects.

* * *

Dec. 17

Finally!

I have enough pills!

It's like the middle of the afternoon so no one is doing anything!

I go on ahead an do it! They want find me till dinner time and by then I want be alive!

YES!

I'm only writing in here for the last time because well...I gotta say I love this little journal.

I mean I"ve had it threw everything!

My mom going to the loony bin,my dad re marring,my brother truing into Hell Kasier,my friends and mines adventures at DA! EVERYTHING!  
So that's why I choice to write in you one last time little journal.

I have also choice to write my suicide note in here as well.

I'll leave it near me so everyone can find it.

_**Dear family and friends,**_

_**I know you are wondering why I commented sucide.**_

_**I know your mad and upset with me for it. But when have you guys not been mad or upset with me.**_

_**I love you guys very much,so I figured you desever to have an answer........**_

_**I killed myself because I couldn't stand the pain anymore! The pain I put you guys threw!**_

_**The pain MARK put you throw! **_

_**I'm so sorry but you all knew I wasn't going anywhere.**_

_**I mean I wound up in a mental hospital!**_

_**And even if I didn't go to Ocean Blues and even if MARK wasn't real....this would have happened and we all know it.**_

_**I wasn't going anywhere and I was dragging everyone I loved down.**_

_**Because you guys hate MARK so much. If I died then he's die with me! **_

_**I'm so so so so sooooooo sorry for this and the pain I put you all threw over the years. I'll probably rot in hell for this anyway so don't worry I'll get what I deserve.**_

_**I want you to know I still love you guys! Even if don't still love me after this or because of MARK or just because......**_

_**I still love you.**_

_**I'm sorry and like I said I love you and I'm missing you already,**_

_**-Syrus Jay Truesdale**_

_**Step. 5 -Dec. 17 3:09 p.m**_

* * *

**Syrus : Did I just kill myself?!**

**Me : Maybe....we'll find out next chapter.**

** Syrus : No tell me right now! DID I JUST OFF MYSELF?!**

**Me : Well.....I don't know what to tell you buddy.**

** Syrus : Ummm...the answer!**

**Me : *Wispers answer into Syrus ear***

**Syrus : .......really.......**

** Me : Yeah....really....**

**Oh man! Did Syrus just kill himself!**

**And if he did....is the story over!**

**Find out in CHAPTER 21!**

**Hey,sorry for the short chapter but it's a clifehanger and all and it's Chrismas eve. ^_^**

**Merry X-mas everyone! And a happy new year too! **


	21. The End

**Hellow people! It's the end of the story and I know your all waiting to find out if Sy killed himself so I want keep going.....**

**I don't own anything....oh and I didn't Yugioh gx for Chrismas like I had hoped. =(**

* * *

_Dear little brother,_

_I miss you so much. I can't belive your gone now. _

_I know you we're in pain......but I wish you would have told me. I mean I'm your older brother and I would tryed to fix it._

_I know we fough, but we had our good times too....._

_Why didn't you come to me? I would have helped you! I wish you would have at least said something! At least told me you felt like this!_

_I though it was MARK! At first I though he was the reason you killed yourself but once I read that note.....I learned you had this plained for a long time._

_Sy....you had a future.....you never drug me down......you where gonna get better and leave the mental hospital.....but I guess no one ever told you._

_So now I have to tell you in death,what I should have told you in life. _

_You where so nice and you where the best brother. You didn't desever any of the things that happened to you! _

_I should have helped you......but I didn't. I though if I didn't help you, that it tounghen you up but all it did was break you down!_

_Syrus I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry I was a bad brother! I'm sorry I didn't help you when you needed me most! I"m sorry little brother,I'm sorry._

_I miss you and love as much as ever._

_Your big brother,_

_Zane Brain Truesdale_

* * *

_Hey,sport....it's Dad....._

_I didn't want my good bye to be like a letter....I wanted it to be like we where just talking. Something I guess we never got to do much....._

_I really don't know what to say,Syrus. You where a good kid...a little messed up at times but hey no one's perfect._

_Syrus....I wasn't there....I wasn't there for you at home....I didn't vist you at Ocean Blues' enough.....I'm sorry for that son._

_You never put me threw pain.....I want you to know that I love you very much....even if I never told you that._

_Love, _

_Dad_

* * *

_Dear Syrus,_

_They say twins are very close. _

_I wonder if that counts for us two since we where ferturnal twins. You know you being a boy and me being a girl._

_Anyway....I hate that you did this to yourself brother. _

_I was mad at you for it.....but I'm not mad anymore. _

_Once I cam to terms with that my anger turned to saddness....wich it was all along._

_Syrus I'll miss you till I met up with again in heaven. _

_But till then I'll see your face in my reflection........_

_With love,_

_your twin sister Kearen._

* * *

_Dear Syrus,_

_It's aunt juciey! I hope you know that I love you and don't have any hate towards you for this. I'll never stop missing you and I love you._

_I watched you grow up from a baby to the hansome young man you where and still are._

_Missing you,_

_Aunt Juciey Fruit_

* * *

_Syrus honny, I wish you wouldn't have done this._

_I wish you where still here! You may not have been my real son but I always considered you to be! I loved you so so so so very much._

_I'll never stop missing you,sweetie. I loved you like you where my own son....._

_Syrus it's is true that we hated MARK! But we loved you more than we hated him! Love beats Hate Syrus.....but I guess...it's a little too late to tell you that._

_Sweet heart I loved you so much and...I still do. I'll never stop loving you! Never!  
I know that there will be days when I'm mad at you,where I want to know why,days where I'm gonna feel like it's my fault.....days where I miss you so much I'll want to join you in heaven. But I know I'll make it threw till I see you again._

_Love,_

_Your Step-Mom Holly_

* * *

_My little boy,_

_Why? Why did you do this? _

_Why!?_

_You had such a great life ahead of you! You where going to get better.....you wheren't going to be like me! Like me.....all hurt and broken on the inside....._

_You wheren't suposed too anyway......._

_Syrus you where my little boy,my baby.....I can still remeber what it like when I was pergant with you and you kicked inside of me. I remever holding you when you where born....you where such a sweet little baby.....so cute and soft._

_I didn't get to see you grow up because I away.....but I still got pictures and got to talk to you over the phone....._

_Syrus I loved you more than life,and I"ll always miss you.....heck I may even see soon because this pain is becoming too much._

_Love,_

_Mama_

* * *

_Dear Sy,_

_Hey,Buddy! It's Jay! _

_I can't belive what happened to you....because I mean I had just saw you like a month before...._

_But I don't think any less of you. I know you weren't in your right mind when it happened. I know you hated to do this but and that you though you where helping us._

_But Sy I just want you to know that you never drug me down.....you where my best friend buddy. Heck,you where the little brother I never got to have._

_Sy I don't know where we go when we die but I know you'll be there.....waiting on the rest of us.  
I want to think we go to heaven and that your waiting on us.....I don't think you go to hell for sucide......I think you go to heaven._

_I want you to know I love you buddy and I miss you,_

_Jaden_

* * *

_Half Pint,_

_I know we never got along much but I want you too know that even that we fough and stuff you where one of the best friends I ever had!_

_I'll miss you.  
- Hasselberry_

* * *

_Dear Sy,_

_This is from me and Atty. I had to write it because Atticus is comforting Zane......_

_We miss you very much....I wish you would have come and talked to me about this. Not the killing yourself part. I know you weren't thinking clear when you did that...._

_I'm talking about MARK! _

_You said you had black outs and heared some voices.....I wish you would have told me...or Zane or Atty or Jaden or your folks or anyone!_

_Cause I can't help but think if you did you'd still be here! That you wouldn't have gone threw all that! _

_Sy I miss you and Atty misses you too._

_With lots of love,_

_Alexis and Atticus_

* * *

_Dear Sy-Sy,_

_Aunt Juciey is letting me write in your journal. I don't why,because you never let me. _

_But I want you to know that I'll miss you when your away._

_Mommy and Daddy said your gone to sleep and your not gonna wake up. Zane just said you went on a trip and your not coming back._

_I wish you weren't going on that trip and I wish you would wake up cause I don't know who's gonna play with me._

_Your a good big brother and I don't get why I have to wait so long to see you agian._

_With Hugs and Kisses,_

_Your little sister, Mckenzie_

* * *

Once the everyone had writen their good bye's in Syrus's journal Sy's step-mom and his Dad put it in his comfen next to him.

After that....the cofen was closed.

The journal would never be wrote in again...not by Syrus............ or by Mark.

* * *

**Yeah that's the end! **

***ducks behind big rock* don't kill me! **

**Yes,I know Syrus died! I wasn't going to kill but then I changed my mind.**

**So very sorry and please don't hate me,and please reveiw!**


End file.
